I'd rather be

I got a letter from a good friend in rehab. I am supposed to be writing him back. I should have been writing him back for a week now, at least. I don't do it though. I don't know what to say.

That isn't it.

I don't want to write him.

I think I am good friend. I use being a good friend as an excuses to get out of doing things and for doing other things.

But I'm not really a good friend.

I'm selfish, greedy, calculated, needy, emotional and a drunk.

I don't even want to write this.

I don't want to write anything.